November is a month dedicated to giving thanks. As parents, it is easy to get stuck in the monotonous routines of school, homework, making dinner, doing laundry, afterschool activities, and the list goes on. Sometimes we forget to pause and reflect on the everyday ordinary moments. When our kids have meltdowns we often become frustrated, annoyed and sometimes we are in a “just not having it” type of mood. Embracing November’s ambience of thanks and gratitude, what would it be like to find gratitude in your child’s meltdowns? Yes, that’s right, gratitude in meltdowns! You probably just rolled your eyes, or you may have snickered to yourself, but, what if you could flip the script and were able to see the wisdom in a meltdown? The truth is children have brilliant ways of getting their needs met, they are born somehow knowing that crying is the way to get their needs met. When children get older they learn to talk, learn how to communicate, and parents expect their kiddos to be able to communicate fully at any given moment. Remember brains are not fully developed until 25 years old, so expecting our children to communicate with us crystal clear, may actually cause us more harm in the long run. Meltdowns at age 5,8,10 are the same thing as a baby crying, a call for help. No matter what age your child is a meltdown is a sign that they are experiencing dys-regulation and need your help to get back on track. What if the next time your child had a meltdown you viewed it the same way you once viewed your baby crying when they needed you? Could you do it? Could you at least try? We challenge you to try to meet your kid with compassion and see their meltdown just as wise as a baby crying when they are hungry or needing a diaper change. Let us know how it goes!
“Gratitude turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity…it makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.” Melody Beattie